My name is Devin Pinkston. I'm a Millenial and Gender Therapist/Sex Therapist in Grand Junction Colorado. I'm not your average clipboard and checklist therapist with a stuffy office. I want to talk about your intimate questions relating to sex, gender, relationships (monogamous or non-monogamous) and all things LGBTQ+ from a modern standpoint. Ask me anything!

Devin Pinkston
May 12, 2018

I'm a 27-year-old mixed race individual. I was raised in Memphis, TN, went to grad school in Indiana, and ended up in Colorado! I have a masters degree in clinical mental health counseling and hold a board certified counseling certification (NCC-national certified counselor). I specialize in Gender therapy which helps individuals who are transgender and gender non-conforming move forward with their medical transitional needs. Here's a link a short video about me and my work within the LGBTQ community I Am More Than Just a Counselor: I'm an Advocate

I am also the president of the local non-profit PFLAG (parents and friends of lesbians and gays) Grand Junction Chapter. Of my background in sex therapy, I've been listed as a co-author in a few academic journals on male sexual dysfunction. I'm not shy when it comes to talking about sex, but I will not disclose that personal information about myself. That being said, I do use some anecdotes from my own experiences in certain areas of my life when in session with clients. I am also polyamorous (ethically dating multiple people) with my two long-term partners, and help individuals in open relationships of all sorts navigate those processes. To learn more about my private practice you can check out my website here

My social media links are also listed here if you would like to follow!

Facebook, Devin Pinkston Gender Therapist

Twitter, Devin Pinkston

Facebook, PFLAG Grand Junction

GoFundMe-PFLAG Grand Junction Donation Page


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Can a person realize very late in their life that they had sexual orientation to the same sex? Is it possible?
May 17, 8:45PM EDT0
What is the overriding reaction people have to polyamory, given those connections are so strong?
May 17, 5:38PM EDT0
Do you think the experience of a polyamorous woman is different from that of a man because of how multiple partners are perceived?
May 17, 12:14PM EDT0
Do you think it is bad to be homophobic?
May 17, 7:34AM EDT0
What is your advice to people who live in an area that doesn’t have a counsellor trained in LGBT issues?
May 15, 10:24PM EDT0
Why should people be informed about gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender issues?
May 15, 2:59AM EDT0

I would say for a number of reasons. For employers for instance you want to make sure you're up to date with state and federal laws on anti-discrimination. As an employee you want to make sure you're on the up and up for the same thing as your job could be on the line! As a member of society you want to ensure that you aren't making blanket assumptions about someone's gender or who they're dating. I sometimes get a personal giggle when it's assumed I have one significant other and that I'm straight. Other times it feels intimidating to let others know that information about me, as I'm not sure whether that person or situation is safe to disclose that information to. Touching on safety that's a big factor! If you've ever had a situation in which you felt unsafe around certain people recall how uncomfortable you felt and where that emotion was coming from. Heck you might've felt uncomfortable and out of place around those of the LGBTQ community! Being informed about LGBTQ issues is just as important for all of those reasons above.

May 15, 6:00PM EDT0
What kinds of treatments or therapies have you found to be particularly effective for your clients?
May 14, 7:45PM EDT0

I tend to use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Solution Focused Therapy, and Person Centered Therapy the most in my practice. I use those modalities across all types of people I see in my office. 

May 14, 9:13PM EDT0
What is the process a patient must undergo in order to be eligible for a sex change?
May 13, 11:59PM EDT0

For WPATH standards the current guidelines are to have been on HRT/CSHT for approximately 1 year and to have two letters of recommendation-one from a mental health professional and one from your endocrinologist or primary care physician. These are only guidelines though as some individuals don't want to be on HRT and want only surgeries. So it will be up to the therapist and physician to make a case for this person. Also insurance companies typically follow similar guidelines and require an individual to wait at least a year, however it never hurts to attempt to petition any denial from your insurance company if you happen to be looking sooner than a year. If you happen to be on HRT the worst they can say is wait until you're at the year marker, or if they deny because you haven't started HRT and don't want to it's best to get your providers involved to let the insurance company know the reason you're in need of a petition for services. 

May 14, 1:54PM EDT0
What is your advice to people who are considering a sex change?
May 13, 10:20PM EDT0

Make sure you've looked into your state guidelines about the procedure, as well as any insurance information on what is covered, any out of pocket expenses, and deductibles. Also if you are looking out of state contact the surgeon's office ahead of time to get information on what is needed or required before they can schedule an appointment for you. Typically most surgeons looking to perform SRS (sex resassingment surgery) or also known as gender confirming surgery want a letter of recommendation from a mental health professional and a second letter from either a physician or endocrinologist prescribing your HRT or your pcp. 

May 14, 1:50PM EDT0
How would you respond to the assumption that a trans* person is fake because they choose not to seek the treatment of hormones and/or sex reassignment surgery?
May 13, 6:13AM EDT0

Being transgender is about how you feel at an emotional, mental, and soul level. Not everyone wants to undertake a medical transition, and that's strictly up to that person. I remind others who might ask this question that everyone has a different story to tell about their transitional journey, and you might not be aware of why someone is choosing not to pursue HRT or surgery. Could be related to finances, could be a decision to wait until a later point in time, could be that person feels best just using a different name, pronouns and clothing. Whatever the situation you can't take away how someone feels on the inside and just because you might take a different route as a trans person doesn't mean it has to be a cookie cutter route for everyone else. 

May 13, 4:31PM EDT0
Do you have the authority to deny your patient a sex reassignment and what would be the reasons for you to deny such a request?
May 13, 5:42AM EDT0

I don't have any specific authority to deny someone moving forward with a gender transition, however following WPATH standards (World Professional Association for Transgender Health), I could note in my recommendation any trepidations I have that might interfere from a psychological or mental health stand point. Not unless someone is displaying a very unstable emotional pattern and they aren't consistent in their desire to move forward with a surgery would I feel a hesitation in moving them forward. So far I have not had that happen, but there's a first for everything! I would definitely consult with the referring physician or surgeon for guidance on that one as well to ensure we all as providers are making an appropriate decision for that person. 

May 13, 4:26PM EDT0

Not much of a question but you are too cute. Just saying ;)

May 12, 7:25PM EDT0

Thank you! Let me know if you do have any questions though.

May 12, 7:26PM EDT0
How can people connect with your non-profit PFLAG to contribute and support the cause?
May 12, 7:14AM EDT0

PFLAG is a national organization with many different chapters across the country. Here is a link to the national website for those looking for something in their area if you don't happen to live on the western slope of Colorado.

If you're looking to help support and dontate to our chapter in Grand Junction, here's the link to our website. You can find the "Donate" button on the home page. You can also go directly to our Gofundme page which has been established through paypal with our 501(c)(3) status as a non-profit.

May 12, 5:07PM EDT0
How did you first learn about the emotional/mental health needs of gays and lesbians?
May 11, 6:56PM EDT0

I first learned of the unique needs of the LGBTQ community while I was interning in graduate school at one of the local counseling agencies that had a pride group. Like any marginalized group (e.g. race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender, etc) I noticed there was something I wanted and could do to help. That was 4 years ago now and still at it today!

May 12, 5:01PM EDT0
Do you routinely get detailed sex histories from each person you work with?
May 11, 5:12PM EDT0

I wouldn't say routinely. If someone is coming in to talk about depression and sex has nothing to do with it I don't necessarily go there with someone. I might briefly ask about relationships or sexual orientation and whether that seems to be playing a part in someone's symptoms. So unless they're specifically coming in to address a sexual problem that's not apart of my typical intake. 

May 11, 8:15PM EDT0
What’s your advice to a young man or woman who is new to sex? Is the internet a good teacher on that?
May 11, 11:21AM EDT0

The internet is a compilation of the good, the bad, and the in between! So on one hand, yes it can be a great learning tool if you're using it to research educational information about the human body, sexual organs, and sexual pleasure. Or if you happen to be seeking advice or support from other people who might be experiencing similar sexual or intimacy issues. Finding sexual gratification online is also not in itself inherently evil or negative. That's my own personal stand point as everyone will have differing opinions on that, and I support all standpoints that people feel are healthiest for them. So long as seeking sexual gratification is safe for yourself, someone else, and/or is consensual for all parties involved. The internet can be negative though and one can easily find themselves in a rabbit hole of confusion if searching blindly for information about sex and sexuality. So if looking for educational, check out your .org sites and reputable .com sites. 

May 11, 8:22PM EDT0
What is the difference between Gender and Sexual diversities and LBGT?
May 11, 9:49AM EDT0

Gender is the state of being male, female, or non-binary. It does not reference biological sex. 

Sexual diversity refers to all diversities of sex characteristics and sexual orientations. Sometimes gender can get wrapped into that as well, but gender and sexuality are different (who you want to go to bed as, versus who you want to go to bed with).  So this is an umbrella term for sexuality and sexual orientations. 

LGBT is an acronym that stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender. Sometimes Queer/Questioning, Asexual, Ally, Intersex and Identity are also tacked on to that acronym. People have now started using LGBTQ (+) as a catchman for everyone. 

May 11, 8:28PM EDT0
Do you think people can ever live happily in a non-monogamous relationship?
May 11, 1:57AM EDT0

I think that's definitely up to the people in the relationships! Like monogamous relationships, non-monogaous relationships take work and effort. All relationships also go through growing pains at different times of strife and people changing in the relationships too. So yes happily ever afters can exist for mongamos and non-monogamous relationships. It's just up to you to make it happen, and how you definie 'happily ever after.'

May 11, 8:13PM EDT0
Are there any changes that you have observed over the years, in the types of clients and/or issues that come to you at Gender Therapy?
May 10, 7:32PM EDT0

Hmm I haven't given much thought to trends in gender therapy. There aren't many changes that I can recall in issues that clients bring in to counseling for that service. The field of mental health, psychology, and medicine have definitely changed regarding their outlook on gender and sexual orientation. So although terminology and how we approach and identify people is changing rapidly 'old school counselors' and the field of medicine are sometimes a bit behind in how they refer to people or approach treatment.

May 11, 8:08PM EDT0
Where you always polyamorous? How do you balance your life with your partners? Do they have other relationships too?
May 10, 3:11AM EDT0

I didn't discover what polyamory was until I was in college. As a teenager and young adult I continued to have these attractions to other people (emotionally and physically) even when I was in happy and healthy relationships. I simply thought I was doing relationships 'wrong' by having those thoughts and once I discovered that there was a term to having multiple partners I thought BOOM that's me! It's a lifestyle choice though. I have one partner that lives in IL and he and I have known one another for 7 years, dated for about 4 or 5 of them. My local partner and I have been together for almost 4 years. We met in graduate school and moved out to Colorado together. It's definitely a challenge balancing the two! With my long distance partner we take time to set aside date nights through phone calls or video calls. We try and visit one another as well at least a few times throughout the year. My local partner I get to see all of the time so it's more about finding time to do my own thing and couple things together. It's not a 50/50 relationship as one is far and one is near, but it's been about a balance in each that works for me and them. To answer your question about whether they have other parnters, my local partner has dated in town and recently ended a 3 month relationship. That was on solely on the terms of him and his former parnter. My partner in IL has dated on and off but currently they are both only dating me. There's no rule about that though and completely up to them individually on when to pursue other people! 

May 11, 8:05PM EDT0

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